Musings from the Crazy Cat Lady on Election Eve: The Resistance and J.K. Rowling

My Favorite Author

I am an old-crazy-cat-lady that writes. I have ascended to this august status from the state of just plain crazy cat-lady that reads prolifically! You might wonder, but probably wouldn’t ever, now, which author does a b@+$h!t  writer with a runaway imagination like best? The answer is J.K. Rowling—definitely J.K. Rowling. The reason is as follows: tomorrow is election day and young people, who cut their teeth on Rowling’s moral compass, are turning out to vote in droves to drive a certain unnamed Wizard out of the White House. Rowling’s avid readers, Generations M and Z, know a Lord Moldy-wort when they see one. I am confident they will do whatever it takes to defeat both the princess of darkness and his soul-eating cabal. Voting to oust HE, whose name should never be mentioned, is only the younger generations first step to magically creating the world of compassion and fairness that live in the Harry Potter series. So, thank you, J.K. Rowling for your contribution to literature and your call for all good young witches to fight for the side of common decency. The young ones, having lived through a devastating wizards’ war, know that anything of value comes only at a great cost. Therefore, if we should lose this battle, our young agents of change will come back to this ongoing war on darkness fiercer and more resolute in their determination to defeat self-serving and aggrandizing evil-- once and for all and in the next election. Thank you, now, I am off to buy a new broom. I will need it to go vote and sweep out the White House.

FatPat


The Truth of it All: Skate Carefully!

The pandemic and one crazy dream full of screaming and desperation threw the hollow fruitlessness of my life back in my dumb face. For example, I assumed that someone that I missed and loved was far away living happily in some wooded, cool area with a lot ferns and drizzle, and possibly some kids around. As it turns out, I was wrong. I'm almost always wrong about people, and the while the truth is ironic beyond belief, it is just the kind of twist that I deserve. Right this moment I'm paying a stiff price for my complacency and inability to face reality. I'm forced to think about the person I was as well as think about the person I've become. Honestly, I don't like either one of them very much.

I also made the crucial mistake of asking my son to rebuild my old roller skates while I waited for the new ones to arrive on back order. Never ask someone that rides a skate board to rebuild your roller skates because the concept of drag and traction isn't in the skate boarder's base of worldly knowledge. They ride hell-bent for leather with the wheels on total freedom. Skates, as you know, require a lot more control. I was determined though; you have to give me credit for that. I tried hanging on my lawn chair to get going, but the skates felt like they were parked on a patch of ice, and within less than ten feet I had done some kind of combination of splits and bum bust on the concrete at an incredibly slow and tortuous pace.

Honestly, I couldn't even get back up on my feet without taking the skates off because I literally had wheels spinning the hell out of control. Lucky for me, I don't think my neighbor taped the whole incident, at least I hope not. If he did, I hope he leaves out the part where I am trying desperately to perch on the tips of my toe stops so I can limp, scoot, or crawl back to my lawn chair.

Anyway, my life is a combination of "I am sorry" and if there is a way "I have to fix all of this"! I'm also living with a ton of back, neck, and butt pain right now, along with a vicious case of writer's block.

Roller skate


Thinking about Covid: Trucking versus Teaching

Creeps and pervs all over the place, and like I should expect something different considering the times. The chimes on my patio quiver with each circulation of my neighbor's air conditioner, and I wonder if I'm safe to sit out and watch the stars, or if I'm just breathing in Covid infused, smoke-filled air. At night I create digital content for my students, and on weekends I write lesson plans that I'm required to post in little folders for each and every day and upload to my learning management system. I barely have time to grade anything, but I assigned an essay for my dual credit kids and I have 65 students. That means I have 65 long essays to grade this week on top of the digital content, the folders, the honor society stuff, and the all around tough environment now that I'm forced to go back in the building. Next week I will drive the 14 miles to that building, go through a temperature check and facial recognition system, and then hibernate in my room for eight hours with my new mini fridge and microwave and still teach my students from a computer.

Outside the sun will shine, and at home my pets will be alone. My books scattered on every wall and corner of my apartment will sit on their shelves and miss me, as I will miss them. The cameras around my place will mindfully and suspiciously catalog the goings and comings from my street, and the cameras in the school hallway will track my occasional bathroom runs down the long and empty hallway. The hallways are basically empty because most parents are keeping their kids home because of the virus, but teachers still have to report even though the Texas Education Agency is still working from home until next year. That's what happens when you have a broken government; people are put in perilous and reckless situations, while the privileged few get whatever they need to keep them safe.

Even with all the terrible, reckless, weirdness, I have to admit that I enjoyed seeing all my coworkers in person again. They all think I'm kind of a snob, or maybe too nerdy. Most of them keep their distance, which is okay with me, especially now when I think how awful it would be if I brought some germs from my neighbor's air conditioner, or from the giant hookah pipe that fires up every night two patios down. Right now, in this moment, I am healthy in every respect. My mental health is okay, and my physical health is about as good as it gets for me...I am in the normal range for me. But, right now, I want to be honest with everyone; I am afraid. I really don't want to die with Covid. Even after working on the road for almost three decades alone, and if not alone, then not in the best company, I never felt this threatened by any disease, or any human. 

I loved to drive and travel. I fell sick with a flu-like illness only once. My boss at the time drove out to get me in his pickup since I wasn't that far from the yard, and he chugged down one Marlboro after another with the windows up tight on that Texas panhandle morning. And honestly, I thought I would die. A true asshole, he was a classic. Even though he hates me now because I'm one of those "damn liberals" he seemed to care that I was sick back then. Nothing felt better than the rumble of my truck under my bare feet, but to punish me for getting sick on the road and needing time off, he gave my truck to some other person. As soon as I felt better, I was back out on the road in a bigger and badder truck working for a better boss, watching the sky make its rounds from early morning nutmeg colored glory to its shadowy, dark and blissful, creamy blackness.

Since I've been teaching, I've gotten sick with respiratory type illnesses on a regular basis. I think because schools are disease vectors, and I didn't have much immunity built up since I had spent the biggest part of my life running up and down the road alone. You would think truckers would be all diseased and sick because of the insidious nature of truck stops and road side diners, but no. The same holds true for stupidity or ignorance; most truckers are smart in an uncommon and crafty kind of way, and some are just plain well educated. After my child came and ended my perpetual aloneness, together we traveled endless miles in a parade of beautiful trucks. But, in the end, no matter what, we always end up handing our keys over to someone else. This time, I'm not ready.

999ACDF4-DE61-42F9-BC32-62BD51A9C714


On the Eve of Politics and Education, Our Struggle with Covid

Tonight I am deeply sorrowful because of the cheap shots taken at me from behind the scenes, the trust I extended dashed to the dry and cracked, filthy ground. The long week of pitiable nonsense and dismal returns on my shabby dollar, and all of it because of a sisterhood of angry and jealous protractors that wallow in myth and gossip, while burrowing into a dark well of competition and back biting during a historical time of disease and political strife. 

Kamala Harris, while certainly not a perfect choice, is a representation of smart and tough, something we need during a time when people are willfully engaging in ignorance and conspiracy, the kind of anti-intellectualism that destroys credibility and engenders a dangerous philosophy of white supremacy and anti-science idiocy. She belongs with us, just as all strong women belong with us.

When we need help, we get voter suppression. When we need togetherness, we get isolation and distrust. When our healthcare professionals need respect and protections, they receive conspiracy theories and ignorance instead. We have an executive branch actively suppressing the vote while they openly destroy and defund a national treasure, our postal service. 

When I look into the conversations online, I see a school district in my neighborhood so overwrought with politics and football, that they would willfully risk the lives and health, the well-being of their entire workforce, for a dream consisting of nothing but denial and silly nostalgia. The risks involve my entire community because as they force teachers, staff, and other workers to convene on crowded campuses, the virus will spread from person to person, and ultimately exponentially infect us.

Donald Trump, Greg Abbott, Dan Patrick, and others like them, represent the lowest of human form during a time of crisis and ill health. They are the type of men that would beat a child from its bed because it was sick. They look down upon ill health as if it is the fault of the bearer, yet, Abbott himself is profoundly disabled, confined to a wheel chair. His lack of empathy is shocking and offensive because Covid creates disabilities; it causes wheelchairs to become occupied; it disrupts the livelihoods, the health, the well-being of all who come into its path. Covid has made its own form of political power and oppression. To deny this, is to be dangerously arrogant. 

BlackLivesMatter


Trump: A Letter to the Most God Awful President Ever

Thank You Mr. Trump: Things are really messed up 😷

I can’t think of anything more grotesque than you being president. Wait, let me back up and start at the beginning because this is pretty heavy stuff. The fact that people are so imbecilic that they actually voted for you is extremely frightening and unreal even though it happened way back in 2016. The fact that they continue to support you is like witnessing a terrible wreck and the remaining bloody carnage. The fact that your followers align you with some kind of religious sanctity is laughable and ridiculous. Your hateful, aggressive tone, your mannerisms, remind me of a rapist, and this becomes especially apparent when you tell women to “be calm” or “to just relax.” I agree that Biden is a creep too, but I’m going to vote for him because another four years of Trump-style destruction and authoritarian tendencies will destroy what is left of our natural world and human decency. I can’t think of even one nice thing to say to you because you are responsible for so many deaths. The fact that all you care about is the next MAGA rally is catastrophically disturbing as the virus is continuing to spread and more people will become infected because of your dumb policies. People are trying to save their businesses and their jobs, but you made it an even more dog-eat-dog world because the “help” that you and Congress provided didn’t go far enough or long enough to save anything. Your “help” was really just designed to fit the needs of big business, not to mention the pain and suffering your callous neglect caused our healthcare workers, and doctors and nurses. Your press conferences are abusive and disgusting, just opportunities for you to falsely advertise your nonexistent skill set and give big business free advertising it doesn’t deserve. Now, this equally unattractive and ugly toad, Mitch McConnell, is trying to force people to go back to work in a world that is unsafe, unclean, disorganized, and infectious. The Senate should have thrown you out of office when they had the chance. It's a crime that they let you slide.

Suggesting that this virus will just disappear is grotesque, completely grotesque. Suggesting that disinfecting the inside of a person’s body is grotesque, completely grotesque. Overriding your own healthcare team with stupid distractions and misguided, dumb hunches is grotesque. You are a disgrace to America in every way possible. All of those bodies, the chaos, the pain, the loss, all of it is on you. Nothing is is more grotesque than you being president.

Shutterstock_385504729

 


Governor Abbott, Why are You Lying to Us?

If I could write Abbott a letter (I could, but I don't think he would read it), I would ask him why he lied to the citizens of Texas during his press conference update on Coronavirus today. He claimed that testing "wasn't any good if you are testing negative." This is totally wrong, and I don't know why he would say this unless he just wants to make an excuse for catering to the Trump administration. We can't know who is silently spreading this disease unless we test wide swaths of the population, sick or not, because carriers are frequently asymptomatic. 

He also said that he was going to follow Mnuchin's directives about restarting business. Mnuchin would be happy to sacrifice the working class on the altar of his stock market in order to satisfy Trump. When Mnuchin and Trump talk about sacrifice, they are talking about your life. Abbott was happy to kiss up to his conservative base and strangle rural hospitals out of existence by cutting the funding. Anything that neoliberals like Abbott can do to destroy the fabric of public life, they will do. Destroying the fabric of public life includes using austerity to cut funding and collapse safety nets like county hospitals, rural doctors, Medicaid, and so on.

These "holier than thou" conservative types like Abbott believe that safety nets for working class people and generational poor are a waste of money; they think these populations of vulnerable people are undeserving of anything except charity. That is why charity, especially from Christian sources, is encouraged over using government to properly distribute tax dollars. When charities manage everything, then charities can make decisions based on their private set of moral values. They use these moral values against the recipients of their charity.

Shutterstock_1473199076

This is a destructive and undemocratic way to govern a society. Neoliberalism leads to death and violence. We can see this in action as Trump uses briefings to spread disinformation and bully and insult the free press. As we sit here now watching this horror unfold, we can also see the gaps, huge chasms really, between the haves and the have nots. But people like Abbott see the world through a neoliberal lens, a lens that devalues human life using deception and a "profits over people" approach to every decision.


Coronavirus and My Late Relatives: What Would They Say or Do?

It's my late brother's birthday today, and usually I dedicate this date to him as a sort of holiday or time of reflection. But today is so incredibly bizzarro with Covid-19 declared as a pandemic and the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo shut down, that I'm just totally discombobulated, like a person in a corn maze wandering around lost.

I always try to think how my late relatives might feel about current events, as a means of putting it all into perspective while attempting to access some of their wisdom. 

My brother would probably make rude comments about Asians and wet markets and what animals certain people are drawn to eat. Then he would probably flip right around and tell me that it's none of my business what people of other ethnicities are eating, and that I should learn not to judge. My brother fought against his bigotry on a daily basis. His granite colored eyes would glaze over when he struggled with something ethical, reminding me he was nobody to underestimate. Remarkably rough and uncivilized at times, he seemed to have an honest affinity for dogs and babies, but everything else was dispensable. 

My Uncle Alfred would sputter angry curses and blame the "women."  He taught me everything I know about horses and random acts of kindness, but he was a total misogynist from day one. 

My mother, in spite of periodic fits of anger and drama, always remained calm and logical in a complete meltdown of all social or family norms. In the midst of this pandemic, my mother would recommend stocking a few groceries and making some good cocktails even though she never drank herself and didn't cook much. She would be on top of everything for at least a minimal length of time, and then she would wither away into her room and start making threats via phone or letter that would make the pandemic seem unimportant. 

My grandma could manage the whole crisis from the top of her cookstove, ordering people around as if they were drawing a salary from her neat and well computed check book. Her hand, extremely calm and nurturing, could quickly clip a grapevine for a sound thrashing if you dared get lippy in the midst of an emergency. Grandma would have a lot to say about Trump, and none of what she would say would be feathered in any notion of kindness. She would hate his guts.

Tonight my relatives would wonder why specific questions weren't answered by their president. They would all sit around the kitchen table and talk about how our lives are going to change. They would wonder why the Republicans are so selfish.

Shutterstock_795022531


Collapse of Coronavirus Leadership: Alex Azar, Trump, and Pence? Heck Ya I'm Nervous

No doubt this virus is nothing to joke about because of its dark nature. Look at all of the souls it has recently dispatched, and the intense suffering that it's causing around the globe. If the Trump administration and the CDC are resistant to calling this calamity a pandemic, if WHO doesn't want to call it that, then what exactly are we dealing with? It's certainly more than an inconvenience, especially in the United States.

For us, this pandemic could endanger millions of people because of our lack of a basic social safety net. No one from the Trump administration has said that our government will pay for these long hospital stays and thousands and thousands of tests for individual citizens. If our profit partnerships with hospitals and insurance companies are in charge of billing for this disease, then we could be facing a financial collapse for thousands of individuals with insurance and the certainty of long term debt for those without it.

People are buying food and supplies in bulk, at least around my town. Yesterday, one lonely bag of jasmine rice remained on the shelf, and the dried noodle aisle was almost completely empty, as if a big storm was rolling in. I'm finding sales on weird items like holistic cough medicines and immune support supplements. Name brand vitamins are getting pushed, and so are some off -brand cold and cough medicines.

The liquor store had quite the run yesterday considering that most people were down at the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo Bar B Q event. I guess maybe this isn't that unusual, except if you follow what people are actually saying around town they pretend they aren't concerned at all. I haven't seen anyone wearing a mask, but I have seen an uptick in people rubbing on hand sanitizer. I, in fact, purchased the last bottle of 365 Lavender Hand Sanitizer at my local Whole Foods.

I am going to go ahead and act as weird as possible. I'm a nerd anyway, so no one will notice (not that I think anyone should care what others think about them). Since I pick up nearly every single virus that my kids bring around, I'm spraying all surfaces liberally with Lysol. I'm using hand sanitizer even when I don't need it, and I have picked up quite a few extra things from this place and that place just in case I decide to park myself at home. I'm unabashedly unashamed of my paranoia because I feel as if I am on a winding mountain road with a drunk at the wheel. This morning's visit to the Sunday news shows by Alex Azar the Human Health Secretary, previous pharmaceutical lobbyist, did nothing to assuage my fears. He's not a doctor, and this is not a political hoax as Trump has tried to declare.

Shutterstock_1627256197


Why the Bloomberg Message Matters so Much! Listen America...

Writing in juxtapositions hyphenates how circular and connected everything in the world is. When I interact with my dogs, I parallel their train of thought with my own because I respect the brain, the little soul, that exists in this furry, needy, little body. As Lukács relates his theory of social realism to Marx, he "contends [that human beings] are essentially socio-historical beings" and that the "formation of human society across time is a process of economic transformation, in which deep economic tensions resolves themselves in higher forms of social organization" (Graham 198). Even though Georg Lukács theory of the novel is simply that, a theory about novels, the economic juxtaposition is impossible to ignore. How does this all relate to what is happening in American politics now? Trump, an obvious fascist, represents an opposition to what most Americans fear the most, a debasement of the social structure as it swings left to shelter and support vulnerable individuals coded out of the mainstream economic upturn. 

How much of this upturn is due to an increased expansion of the fossil fuel industry is unknown by me, but I would say that it goes far enough to spike fear in the worker, enough fear to maximize a winner-take-all mindset such as the one that Trump represents. Critical realism debunks any possibility of a happy ending in the great American story because these higher forms of social organization, the economics of the neoliberal/capitalist state, will forbid any transfer of wealth into more sustainable energy forms. While Americans do see a few more solar panels and electric cars around, nothing is happening to offset carbon and methane output, quite the opposite, so a dirtier and more perilous world awaits for our children and grandchildren, even as we now watch helplessly as a worldwide pandemic unfolds. Politics at large, especially left leaning lip service, fails to permeate the echo chamber of winner-take-all-fascist-mindset even on the eve of our destruction.

The politicians on last night's debate stage fail to grasp Lukács theory of society functioning as an economic process constantly in transformation, so in other words, they will fail to beat Trump's fascist ideology because they are unable to adequately assuage the fears of the common worker, the fear of sustainable energy overtaking the fossil fuel industry. Even so, another, more dark and shady goblin lurks behind the transference of power from fossil fuel to sustainable energy, artificial intelligence. Fossil fuel workers realize at some level the sloughing off of jobs to machinery and robots. Even as we transfer wealth from one sector to another, skill based jobs are declining, no matter the purpose or intent. Following a cruel fascist into a dirtier future will only make this economic transformation more difficult and result in more penury and suffering. 

This is why I think it's vitally important to the public that Mike Bloomberg use his platform if not to win, then at least to inform. Stopping Trump means that Americans will face a brighter future even in the face of this economic transformation. Maybe we are trading one neoliberal narcissist for another, but at least Bloomberg is authentic, a strong juxtaposition to Trump.

Shutterstock_1388894738


Donald Trump: Hateful and Bloody, a Danger to Everyone

While we all sit here in shock that our government reached out with a drone and assassinated a top general of a sovereign nation, I wonder why the surprise. Obviously, these swings in policy, these outrageous and perilous acts, simply mean that our government has been hijacked by an authoritarian that has no intention of using regular channels to debate policy. Trump doesn't care at all about the 3500 souls he just issued into certain conflict. Instead of removing our soldiers from the Middle East, he has now insured us of years of entanglements, revenge, and war. He did this dramatic act in order to sway attention from his impending removal from office. 

The Iranian government complied in full to the agreement of 2015, so why did Trump feel it necessary to reestablish sanctions, withdraw from the promise, and plunge our young people into another useless, hate-filled war? He did it because of his destructive nature, the same nature that so many ignorant and hateful people find attractive. In restaurants, bars, and other gathering places, people talk about how he at least "does something." Yes, he certainly has done a lot to bring about an age of darkness unlike anything else we have ever seen. Everything, from his policy of environmental deregulation, to his war-mongering, connects to death, disease, and disaster. Trump alone, even without his neoliberal disgusting family in tow, characterizes the negative downside of unfettered capitalism, a troll that physically resembles the very thing he symbolizes, greed, gluttony, and grief.

For quite some time I have been sitting around just trying to make a difference with the few people I know on social media that are under the star struck spell of hateful Trump and his ignorant GOP followers. But now it has become even clearer to me that as a country we can definitely not risk another four years of this pain. He has to go no matter what it takes. No matter who ends up as his democratic opponent, they must get your vote. If you care anything about the lives of our soldiers and the future of our country, you must vote against Trump. 

In the meantime, while we still can focus, we should turn out attention back to removing him from office. Obviously, he did this as a detraction because he knows he risks going to jail after serving this term. His only recourse, in his mind, is to get reelected at any cost. He doesn't care who dies or suffers. 

TrumpMeme


Moonlight Ramble 2019: The Astros Win!

Honestly, I never expected this year's Ramble to make me so happy. Saint Arnold's Brewery didn't disappoint us by hosting everyone in their beautiful patio, and the Astros made the night more fun by winning the game against the Yankees sending our proud city to the World Series another time. The Astros played their best when our community needed it in 2017 after Harvey, and they pulled it together this year. The only downside to the Saturday night win was clogged sidewalks and city streets with game winning partiers, but I don't know how I can complain about that. 

This year I pulled Bob around in the cart and left Bill at home due to his leg surgery. Thank God I didn't try to drag both dogs this time because I swear the event managers lied about the distance. If it was only ten miles, then that was the longest ten miles I've ever pedaled. My legs felt like rubber, and the streets stretched out forever, plus I swear we had a head wind all night. It also seems like the planners finagled a track that meant we were pedaling uphill because I just felt like I was looking up a long straight incline all night.

Anyway, a long uphill slope, a dog in the trailer, a sliced banana and an outhouse, and an endless ride through Houston's most cultural neighborhoods made me a tired cyclist with a sore bum, but I'm glad I went. 

See you next year!

BicycleHalloween